wishing...
It's sitting in your room waiting for 11:11 to hit the clock, or standing at your window waiting for a shooting star, or making a wish before you take in a huge breath and then let it out to blow the birthday candles out. I will admit that I still do these things even though I am still waiting for my wishes to come true. It gives you a slight sense of hope in that very moment. Maybe, just maybe that thing you are wishing for might just come true. I have always wanted to tie a wish to the end of a balloon, and then release it into the heavens. When I was a little girl I remember letting a ballon go and letting it fly to the sky. My head would draw back further as I watched it go further and further up. Maybe someday I will find my balloons up in heaven somewhere when I get there.
dreaming...
Of course, a dream is a wish your heart makes when your fast asleep.
I am one of those people where a dream seems so realistic that when someone wakes me up, I am truly dissapointed that it is not real. I seem to have more dreams than nightmares, because I have always been a dreamer. I always imagine things the way I want them to be. My imaginations always come true through my dreams. So, I guess what that popular disney song says could be true.
praying...
I seem to ask God for a lot, and I think most all of us do. Lately it seems that I have been doing more wishing and dreaming than praying, although, I strongly believe that prayer overpowers both. My wishes though, go to God. Sometimes I get so frustrated because I want everything right now. I sometimes don't understand why he can't just hand my wishes down to me. If he did though, I think I'd be one ungrateful person. He gives me an oppurtunity to be patient, because good things come to those who wait.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Our Hearts In A Mirror
The mirror can lie
Doesn't show you what's inside--Believe In Me by:Demi Lovato
We can all agree that when looking in a mirror we are either completely unhappy, or pleased with what we see. You see, a mirror not only shows you how you look but it shows how you as an individual see yourself.
I know that I tend to overlook how I see myself in the mirror, I focus on my every imperfection. It's a, "My hair is frizzy," or "what is that on my face. This is so embarassing." Right when I see a flaw I freak out because let's face it, I am going to face other people today. Oh no, people...run? Yes, really scary, I know.
You would think that by now I would realize that as humans, we all have flaws. Realization hasn't seemed to hit me yet.
But I shouldn't worry about how I look on the outside, it's more about giving myself a heart check. What if everyone around you saw your every emotion, and thought? Would they like the person they see? Picture it, everything you thought or every emotion you were feeling, just written right there on your forhead for everyone to see. It just screams out 'Hello world! Here I am, it's me Kayley! Here are all my real thoughts, and all my honesty right here on my forehead for you to see. Can you except me now that you know who I really am?'
It's like the song by Casting Crowns, Love Them Like Jesus. The title in itself explains the song. Despite who the person is, what they are going through, how they appear to you, just love them like Jesus. It's hard, and I will be the first to tell you that I struggle with it. His love never fails, no matter who we are as a person or how we look. He doesn't care about our outward appearance, he looks at the heart. I can't imagine how the world would look if we accepted people for who they truly are, and not just by their looks. Better perhaps?
Doesn't show you what's inside--Believe In Me by:Demi Lovato
We can all agree that when looking in a mirror we are either completely unhappy, or pleased with what we see. You see, a mirror not only shows you how you look but it shows how you as an individual see yourself.
I know that I tend to overlook how I see myself in the mirror, I focus on my every imperfection. It's a, "My hair is frizzy," or "what is that on my face. This is so embarassing." Right when I see a flaw I freak out because let's face it, I am going to face other people today. Oh no, people...run? Yes, really scary, I know.
You would think that by now I would realize that as humans, we all have flaws. Realization hasn't seemed to hit me yet.
But I shouldn't worry about how I look on the outside, it's more about giving myself a heart check. What if everyone around you saw your every emotion, and thought? Would they like the person they see? Picture it, everything you thought or every emotion you were feeling, just written right there on your forhead for everyone to see. It just screams out 'Hello world! Here I am, it's me Kayley! Here are all my real thoughts, and all my honesty right here on my forehead for you to see. Can you except me now that you know who I really am?'
It's like the song by Casting Crowns, Love Them Like Jesus. The title in itself explains the song. Despite who the person is, what they are going through, how they appear to you, just love them like Jesus. It's hard, and I will be the first to tell you that I struggle with it. His love never fails, no matter who we are as a person or how we look. He doesn't care about our outward appearance, he looks at the heart. I can't imagine how the world would look if we accepted people for who they truly are, and not just by their looks. Better perhaps?
Thursday, February 5, 2009
My life story written in pen.
Staring down at a peice of notebook paper with writing. The paper is filled with marked out words. My eyes scan continuously gaze over every word. Why are they so familiar? Then I look at the title Life Story by: God.
I hear it a lot, God's writing your life story. I firmly believe in the statement. If I were to read my life story from a peice of notebook paper I believe it would look like what I described in the first paragraph. To me it would be like reading one of my 7th grade essay rough drafts, alot of mark throughs, errors, and in desperate need of improvement. Isn't that like life though?
As humans, we are prone to make mistakes and I myself make a lot of them. Whether it be as simple as just tripping down the stairs, or a more consequence worthy not shutting my mouth before I say something that may not be music to my parent's or other peoples ears. My mistakes are the sentences that get marked out, because Jesus went to the cross for my slip ups even though I am not worthy of his forgiveness. His Love is incomprehensible and there isn't one word to descibe it. I am unworthy of his never ending love and yet he takes those mistakes and marks them out. I am forgiven.
The side notes that I became familiar with when I first got into writing essays are like the warning signs, or the notes that I make after I have made a mistake. They are my notes to tell me that when I reach the same kind of obstacle again, don't make the same mistake. It's God telling me, this is what to do next time before you make the same mistake. Remember these notes and embed them deep into your brain.
My desperate need of improvement is me starting on a new sheet of paper. For God, it's like him starting a new paragraph.
It's my job to start over and improve as I continue facing reality in itself.
What can I say? It's my life and I will make mistakes. But I always make sure that through those mistakes I learn something, and I try to improve.
I hear it a lot, God's writing your life story. I firmly believe in the statement. If I were to read my life story from a peice of notebook paper I believe it would look like what I described in the first paragraph. To me it would be like reading one of my 7th grade essay rough drafts, alot of mark throughs, errors, and in desperate need of improvement. Isn't that like life though?
As humans, we are prone to make mistakes and I myself make a lot of them. Whether it be as simple as just tripping down the stairs, or a more consequence worthy not shutting my mouth before I say something that may not be music to my parent's or other peoples ears. My mistakes are the sentences that get marked out, because Jesus went to the cross for my slip ups even though I am not worthy of his forgiveness. His Love is incomprehensible and there isn't one word to descibe it. I am unworthy of his never ending love and yet he takes those mistakes and marks them out. I am forgiven.
The side notes that I became familiar with when I first got into writing essays are like the warning signs, or the notes that I make after I have made a mistake. They are my notes to tell me that when I reach the same kind of obstacle again, don't make the same mistake. It's God telling me, this is what to do next time before you make the same mistake. Remember these notes and embed them deep into your brain.
My desperate need of improvement is me starting on a new sheet of paper. For God, it's like him starting a new paragraph.
It's my job to start over and improve as I continue facing reality in itself.
What can I say? It's my life and I will make mistakes. But I always make sure that through those mistakes I learn something, and I try to improve.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Time Isn't Slowing Down Anytime Soon
Okay, so I wrote this a while back and it really suprised me when I read it over.
I remember the big brown doors that hung in front of me. First day of kindergarten, and everything from here on out wouldn’t stop until I got my high school diploma and walked off the stage. Sure there would be college, but I wasn’t going to be in my hometown anymore.
I remember the table I sat at and who sat there. One in particular name, Courtney (still remains one of my best friends). I remember the vivid smell of Lunchables, and the un-edible school lunches well. I also remember grabbing my kindergarten diploma, and plunging off into the choppy waters of elementary school.
Kindergarten and elementary school seems like yesterday. We were all care free, and didn’t care what others thought about us, because we didn’t have too. There were few people who would point out the messy hair, or the wrinkled clothes.
Surprisingly, boys had cooties and they were immature. They would chase the girls around at recess, and laugh at stupid jokes. What girl needed that?
But that was Kindergarten and Elementary school, where nothing mattered except being you. People accepted you, and everyone was friends (well almost everyone).
There is always a time of change though. Life has passed me almost too fast.
It’s 10:07 p.m. right now, and in about an hour or two I will go to sleep. Today will come to a close, and tomorrow will bring new things.
I will wake up in the morning, and rush to find something to wear. I will go to school, and finish an unfinished math quiz. I will talk to my friends, but half of the time I won’t get what we are talking about. I will see the guy I like tomorrow three or four times. I will get an evil look from the biology teacher whether I am goofing off or not, and the rest of my day will carry on. Before you know it tomorrow will come to a close, and I will start all over the next day.
There is something wrong with this. I want time to stop so I have the time to finish what I need to do. I sit here wishing it will slow down, but I realize something…my life, it’s in front of me, smacking me right in the face. It’s how I choose my time.
My days have gone by so routined. Never once have I stopped and enjoyed today. Not once have I thanked God for everyday.
That’s my problem. I don’t realize that everything is spread out on the table ready to be picked up.
I say I want time to tell my friends how much I care about them; my time is right here just sprinting past me. I say I want time to get things straight; oops there it goes, goodbye. I say I want the time to get to know God; bam Kayley. Oops, maybe next time, hit me before my time arrives.
My point is…my life has been full of heart breaks, losses, friends, and family. My life has run past me, and I have failed to catch it. It’s beating me at that race. Time can’t stop, and it won’t. It is up to us, to spend that time to accomplish our dreams.
After this week is over, half of my freshman year will be over. I will have three and a half years to accomplish my high school goals and not waste time. I have time to get to know God. I have time to tell my friends and family how much they mean to me.
My time is here, where is yours?
I remember the big brown doors that hung in front of me. First day of kindergarten, and everything from here on out wouldn’t stop until I got my high school diploma and walked off the stage. Sure there would be college, but I wasn’t going to be in my hometown anymore.
I remember the table I sat at and who sat there. One in particular name, Courtney (still remains one of my best friends). I remember the vivid smell of Lunchables, and the un-edible school lunches well. I also remember grabbing my kindergarten diploma, and plunging off into the choppy waters of elementary school.
Kindergarten and elementary school seems like yesterday. We were all care free, and didn’t care what others thought about us, because we didn’t have too. There were few people who would point out the messy hair, or the wrinkled clothes.
Surprisingly, boys had cooties and they were immature. They would chase the girls around at recess, and laugh at stupid jokes. What girl needed that?
But that was Kindergarten and Elementary school, where nothing mattered except being you. People accepted you, and everyone was friends (well almost everyone).
There is always a time of change though. Life has passed me almost too fast.
It’s 10:07 p.m. right now, and in about an hour or two I will go to sleep. Today will come to a close, and tomorrow will bring new things.
I will wake up in the morning, and rush to find something to wear. I will go to school, and finish an unfinished math quiz. I will talk to my friends, but half of the time I won’t get what we are talking about. I will see the guy I like tomorrow three or four times. I will get an evil look from the biology teacher whether I am goofing off or not, and the rest of my day will carry on. Before you know it tomorrow will come to a close, and I will start all over the next day.
There is something wrong with this. I want time to stop so I have the time to finish what I need to do. I sit here wishing it will slow down, but I realize something…my life, it’s in front of me, smacking me right in the face. It’s how I choose my time.
My days have gone by so routined. Never once have I stopped and enjoyed today. Not once have I thanked God for everyday.
That’s my problem. I don’t realize that everything is spread out on the table ready to be picked up.
I say I want time to tell my friends how much I care about them; my time is right here just sprinting past me. I say I want time to get things straight; oops there it goes, goodbye. I say I want the time to get to know God; bam Kayley. Oops, maybe next time, hit me before my time arrives.
My point is…my life has been full of heart breaks, losses, friends, and family. My life has run past me, and I have failed to catch it. It’s beating me at that race. Time can’t stop, and it won’t. It is up to us, to spend that time to accomplish our dreams.
After this week is over, half of my freshman year will be over. I will have three and a half years to accomplish my high school goals and not waste time. I have time to get to know God. I have time to tell my friends and family how much they mean to me.
My time is here, where is yours?
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